A case of the awkwards. We all get them; some more than others.

Sometimes it can be in a "cute" way, like a first date or receiving a reward or a nice compliment. Or it can be in a horrible way, like (this has never happened to me I promise but I live in constant fear it will) on a crowded elevator, a sneeze uncontrollably causing an audible flatulence and having to ride several more floors while people do their best to, or not to, control their reactions.

Did you feel that? As you recoiled away from the screen, turned your head, closed your eyes, gritted your teeth, and felt the bottom of your stomach clench, you felt it.

You tasted the pure essence of Awkward, baby.

Then sometimes it comes in another form altogether. I have what I like to call Chronic Acute Progressive Awkwardness (CAPA) and as you may or may not can tell its almost incapacitating to me and my daily activities. It goes beyond shaking a fist bump, copying your exact same sentiments as we say our goodbyes, or letting the silence lull between every subject of conversation. Its ingrained into everything I do even when I am alone. Even my closest companions: dogs, cats, and woodland creatures scurry away and attend to non-descript tasks when I come near.

I need give one last example before I sleep. Yesterday I saw an old friend at church and then when it came time to part I quickly decided that the needed end of our conversation should be an off the wall random fact about a person she didn't know. It was magical for sure.

Soon I will set up a Pay-Pal and 24/7 phone desk to recieve donations but until then keep your check books near.


peece.